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Messages - Weisel

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Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: March 12, 2016, 07:17:42 pm »
I'm here and alive! Surprisingly!

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: February 08, 2016, 11:10:50 am »
Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about, but I think maybe the whole high voices vs. low voices has something to do with the language as well. Like, I speak at a lower pitch when I speak German than when I speak English, and when I'd speak Japanese (which I remember nothing of what I learned lol) it was higher than when I speak English. I don't know if it's the way the sounds are made or if it's a matter of culture (like that's just how people learned). Then again, Inukashi's VA could speak fairly low, but then when she's doing the commentary, her voice is pretty high. Are girls expected to sound young and cute there?? Anyway, I think with German, it's kinda hard to really squeak out all those consonant-heavy words, but with Japanese, there's usually a vowel separating the consonants.

I dunno, I'm not a native speaker of either language...

Karan's Bakery / Re: No.6 cosplay
« on: January 31, 2016, 06:06:33 pm »
Omg very nice!!! Your hair looks super cool, much better than I could ever make my ponytail look. And I do think those contacts work well personally. They look natural enough and they don't scream "BLUE!"

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 29, 2016, 12:01:50 pm »
Aaaahhh I really want to listen, but I'm on mobile... Maybe the cafe across the street will leave their wifi on again. I want to hear Nezumi with a fitting voice.

Speaking of which, I'll be streaming the Japanese version because the English version makes me cry. In pain, that is. Nezumi sounds so... I don't know what word to use. And Shion sounds like an annoying eight year old with a cold. And the names... Ri-KEE-guh! Ya-MAH-say! *screams*

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 26, 2016, 02:07:08 pm »
@kare_reiko I still have to see about setting up wifi for my house, so I'm not sure when I'd actually be able to do that. Once I have everything set up for sure, I'll see about setting up a schedule that fits most people's schedules. I'm thinking of running each episode twice a week, so that would cover more schedules. Definitely a weekend one in there. I'll open up a thread when I can definitely do it to discuss schedule options further, and we'll probably post something on the RC blog so more people can join!

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 25, 2016, 06:43:29 pm »
Lol I remember the first time I accidentally locked a topic... I didn't know they could be unlocked so easily so I panicked, but my cat just stuck her little paw on the trackpad on my computer and locked it and I was like "no one is going to believe this." But this time it's probably just my thumbs. I can click everything way too easily on my smartphone.

On that note... I might finally be able to get wifi next month! Hallelujah! If that happens then I'll start doing live streams of No.6. Yaaaay internet party!!

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 24, 2016, 10:21:23 am »
As for the locked topic, I can't be sure if it was my fault, but there's a possibility it was me. I'm usually on here using my phone, so I'm using a touch screen for zooming and scrolling and sometimes I click the wrong thing by accident. I'm generally careful not to check any of those boxes when I post... So maybe it's not so mysterious, or maybe it IS mysterious. We'll never know!

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 23, 2016, 06:41:13 pm »
Though on that note, I should warn people that some things might be "gone" though I'm not sure what all would be missing. (I can't see my icon right now but that could be my own slow connection.)

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 23, 2016, 06:39:09 pm »

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 13, 2016, 04:13:54 pm »
Yeah, I'm hoping, hoping, hoping... I'm hoping PT will be the turnaround point for me.

The issue with insurance is money honestly. It's all run as businesses from medications to seeing a doctor. Just capitalism doing its thing. :(

I think that's the end of my US healthcare rant. Phew, back to our regular agenda...

I'm gonna hopefully make another cosplay video soon, I was hoping today but we'll see if my stomachache goes away. I have to eat a bunch of chicken nuggets for it, which might be difficult if I feel sick. (I got some weird asks for January...)

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 13, 2016, 12:50:37 pm »
Ah, it's sort of a finicky thing with Lyme over here. My sister got is while in Philadelphia, but she caught it right away thanks to having a friendly doctor as her neighbor. He recognized it right away and made her go to the hospital for the proper antibiotics (since he couldn't exactly treat her from his apartment, haha) and she was able to recover. However, chronic Lyme disease is totally overlooked. In the medical world, it doesn't even "exist" regardless of the people who suffer from it. And like you said, you have to bullshit your way through defending unconventional treatments. No matter how much these doctors help people with chronic Lyme disease, insurance companies will get sued millions and have their licenses revoked for going against protocol. That's the kind of greed involved. As for the risk for me, I got bitten by a tick right on the back of my neck. I think I was ten at the time. I felt something weird and itched my neck, then looked at my hand and there was a crushed tick and my blood smeared all over my fingers. I didn't say anything to my dad because I knew nothing about tick bites or Lyme disease and I didn't want to complain because he always got annoyed when I whined about anything.

As for doctors not listening, it's unfortunately very common for women's issues to be overlooked. Women with serious conditions are often told they have fibromyalgia and are simply given a mild antidepressant and that's the best treatment they get. It seems like we're still stuck in the ages when "hysteria" was the go-to diagnosis for women... Last time I went to the ER was a couple years ago. I was sitting in my room typing on my computer when half my body started going numb and at first I was like "whatever, probably not important" but then I thought about how my friend would have reacted if I told her... and I realized she would have dragged me to the ER herself, so I just went ahead and drove to the ER at about 3AM. Once I got there, the doctor told me it was probably just a panic attack. Didn't matter that I was pretty damn calm, he just dismissed it as a panic attack. I insisted I get a CT scan because jeez, I'm not stupid enough to believe that when half my body is suddenly numb for no apparent reason... (And I'd experience a panic attack where my whole face went numb and this was very, very different.) And unless I've been having a "panic attack" for two consecutive years, it's something neurological going on. Thanks, doc. (I've gone to a neurologist and she found nothing, and it's been left as sort of a dead end case. Doesn't matter that I'm still numb... My PT has an idea, but again, she can't diagnose people.) My first rheumatologist totally brushed off my suspicions of EDS because I'm probably just another depressed woman (doesn't matter how well my psych meds are working, I'm just a mildly depressed lady, after all, as all women in pain are apparently). I at least was insistent about not getting antidepressants because I've got my bipolar meds well balanced now and I don't want to mess with that. I never had much luck with various antidepressants, anyway. I only end up with unfortunate digestive issues and no actual relief. And on the topic of respect towards women, I was "****-shamed" so to speak (a very tumblr phrase I never thought I'd have to use in real life) by my nurse a couple years back. I was checking into a hospital for mental stuff a few years back (things were rough) and my (male) nurse was asking me for my meds list. I had to also tell what my relationship status was for things like therapy (so they know if domestic abuse is a risk I guess, not positive) so he already knew I was single. After telling him I was taking birth control, he was like "you don't have a boyfriend? And you're on birth control?" And I just wanted to tell him to go **** himself. Like, what is this, the fifties?! A lot of women (sometimes even girls) are on it for heavy/painful periods, myself included. I wasn't even sexually active. (He later tried to call me an alcoholic during group therapy and annoyed me while I was trying to write. I should've just kicked him in the balls and stayed there for an extra week. Would have been worth it. I still remember his stupid ugly face.)

At least my primary doctor is good in general. While she'll dismiss some things as not likely, she will send be in for a test or to see a specialist if I express enough concern. Some of the stuff is that she doesn't want me to go through unpleasant tests for nothing, like getting spinal taps and uncomfortable/painful tests. Like I told her I think I have celiac disease (which can go hand in hand with thyroid disease sometimes) because gluten makes me really ill. She said it's possible, but I was already off gluten and feeling better, there was no point in getting tested. Either I'd have to be eating gluten again for a month (and feel sick that whole time) or I could get a test where they'd have to stick a thing up my butt to get into my large intestine... So she was like "just stay off gluten if it helps, and a diagnosis won't help anything because there's no other treatment for it anyway." It's nice that she'll explain things if I ask. She'll get stuff done if I say I really want it done, but she'll tell me why she does certain things, too. Plus she really knows how to work the insurance system. She managed to get me in for a breast reduction within only a few months with no trouble, and it's usually near impossible to get that process going at first for some women. (Of course my surgeon wasn't very good when I kept coming back for wounds opening up... I eventually gave up and just let my roommate use that special medical tape that stays on for days at a time. He sort of made this grid over the wounds to keep things in place. I have a ton of scarring on my chest from that and my whole chest is numb. Anyway, I'm basically saying that even with a good doctor, it's hard to get anywhere with disinterested specialists. There's only so much my primary doctor can do on her own. 

Jeez, I've gotten more trouble from the medical system than I thought. Well, I'm glad you're learning something relatively useful from my rambling.

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 12, 2016, 05:18:30 pm »
@Kai I'll say now I had very little patience for that "friend"... I ended up reaming her out about a lot of nonsense over the years because I think my patience ran thin early on in my life. And she totally had a working laptop then. She definitely had the "only child" personality... (Lol she didn't invite me to her wedding so maybe it finally got through her head that I don't like her.)

I talked to my substitute physical therapist today, and she said my usual physical therapist might be able to write a letter to my doctors since she thinks I might have EDS. I'm already on my "second opinion" rheumatologist and she's way better than the first, but she's still not as receptive as I need her to be. I'd have to go to another place for that, likely hours away from where I live and it'd take months to get an appointment... And then months of waiting for the appointment. Another hard part is finding a doctor that my insurance will cover. It only covers certain hospitals and care (there's still a copay with everything though, it's far from free). It's all just a major hassle, enough I've considered just moving to a country where I can get some real help. Not the easiest option, but then again, it might be just as easy as getting disability assistance (and sometimes they just drop you from the system because ???? who knows. It just happens to some people). I'd like to just move to Finland where they have their country running well and it's cold all the time. I don't even care, I'd make an igloo if I had to. A big problem in the US is that big businesses keep sticking their hands into government things, and with health insurance and pharmaceuticals being huuuuge businesses, it's hard for anything actually beneficial to the healthcare system to be passed. It's all so freaking crazy. If you want a good look at how messed up it is, just look up stuff about Lyme disease. It's crazy. Doctors can lose their license for not following the treatment protocol, but the protocol rarely cures Lyme disease, and it's because pharmacy companies and insurance companies all have some kind of impact on those treatments. It's all about money to them, people are dying, and the people who suspect it's something created by the government are seen as crazy conspiracists (even though the outbreak began right where they were developing biological weapons... like diseases...). That's actually another possibility for me since Lyme disease can affect so many things and I was bitten by a tick in one of the highly affected states when I was a kid. But Lyme disease tests often show a false negative (or a false positive), so I guess I can't say for sure. It's like a dystopian novel, except less cool because it's real. :(

Jeez, sorry for the crazy tangents, I guess I have a lot of opinions about the medical system here in the US. Hopefully it's interesting to someone haha...

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 12, 2016, 12:40:03 pm »
I think there was just a slight difference in the ground nuts from peanuts we're used to, but not much. They tasted almost exactly the same. Sort of like how they had millet instead of corn, just a slightly different type to fit the dry environment. (I was there during the rainy season and it was DRY!)

I went to Ghana with my dad, stepmom, and sister. My dad had traveled there as a volunteer teacher about ten years before that, and he's kept in contact with the one chief he met. He ended up going back several times to help out with the school there (it's a tiny village and the school won't get government funding until it's been running for so many years) and so he was doing that again. (We did some stuff as well, like fixing the desks in the school, but it was mostly my dad doing stuff with the chief.) I think he basically wanted me and my sister to learn more about the world and stop being the prissy princesses our mom raised us to be. I stayed there for a month and I definitely learned a thing or two (or twenty) about the world... I was sixteen then, still in high school. I definitely had a lot less sympathy for some of my friends when they complained about stuff, like my one "friend" (really didn't like her but she had no idea I guess, we were in the same little group though) was complaining that her parents weren't totally paying for her MacBook Pro... I was just like "grow the **** up, you have the money to get it yourself, you spoiled brat." After seeing people living off of nothing and working their asses off just to have enough to eat, it just boggled me. (Not saying parents helping out financially is bad, just expecting them to cover a luxury when you can get it yourself... I'm completely reliant on my mom right now because of medical stuff, but she isn't responsible for fancy new gadgets...) Bleh, I just have less sympathy for "first world problems" so to speak. (PSH, I've turned into Nezumi...)

Uh, anyway, so that trip was definitely the biggest adventure of my life. We almost got involved with a war between tribes (the chief asked for my dad's help since he excels in war tactics) and I was totally willing to risk my life if it was going to help save more lives in the long run, but my dad was like "you should value your life more!" I was reminded of that when Nezumi says that to Shion about the blood serum... I think the funniest thing about it all was that my dad was super concerned about any of us getting sick, but he got giardia (I think that's now it's spelled) and an eye injury. I felt a little bad from the heat sometimes and sometimes my digestive system was like "what the heck is this??" but otherwise I was TOTALLY fine, at least until we went to Europe. (I had a really hard time in Europe, not so much in Ghana, which is the opposite of what I'd expected.) My sister had a panic attack when we first got to the little village, which we thought was a heat stroke, but I guess she just was freaking out because we had next to no communication with the rest of the world, no cell phones or anything... I think she's deeply afraid of death and so she was making herself crazy thinking of all the ways she might die there. The only time I was particularly scared was when I woke up a donkey on accident in the middle of the night on my way back from the bathroom. (It was a good thing it was AFTER going to the bathroom, hahaha...) My sister was with me and somehow she wasn't freaked out by the super loud donkey having a panicked fit and I was just trying not to scream. I was laughing about it as soon as it was over though. (Oh yeah, the language in Ghana is English, very little French. It was one of the few countries in the area that England tried to colonize.)

As for homelessness, it's pretty bad in every city in the US. Even in Ithaca where I used to live (it's a pretty small city as it is, closer to a large town) there were homeless people. The big problem is that in the US, once you're in poverty, you're pretty much out of luck. The "credit" system here is a confusing mess (which comes from specific credit card practices, paying bills on time, stuff like that)... You don't even start off with good credit, you have to work up to it. It's insanity. You can't even get a new car without good credit. Some of the really shitty used car places have signs outside them that say "no credit? no problem!" And in a lot of places here, you really need a car to have any kind of decent life. Only really organized cities have good public transportation. Even in Albuquerque, where you NEED a car because it's so spaced out, the public buses don't start running soon enough for some of the jobs the people in poverty actually need to get to. And then to get an apartment anywhere, you have to have documents saying you regularly make 3x the amount of rent... So if you don't have a job, you don't get a house, even if you have the money to start. Like I said, once you're in poverty, it's hard to get out... Even the homeless shelters aren't so great, the Salvation Army won't help Muslims or transgender people, sometimes gay people (not positive on that one but I wouldn't be surprised), and I think they're the biggest group in "helping" the homeless. Like if I didn't have anyone helping me out right now, I'd be living in my car. It's basically impossible to get anywhere without help. And without a college degree or some kind of certification, it's hard to get a decent job. The best one I ever got was $10/hour. And then when I was okay enough health-wise, I was working three jobs and splitting the costs of rent with a friend (I actually didn't know him beforehand, he was getting kicked out of his house for being transgender so I just told him to come live with me) and we weren't living in luxury, that was for sure... And on top of that, health insurance isn't available to everyone or even cheap for that matter, and healthcare basically run as a business. And without insurance, one medical can put you in debt for life if it's bad enough. They'll even sneak expenses for other people's treatments in your bill sometimes. It's super messed up... I'm on my mom's insurance until I'm 26, so I have to start figuring that out *cries* and filing for disability is practically impossible. Basically they deny every application the first time (no exaggeration) and then you have to apply again with a lawyer to argue your case. And without an "acceptable" diagnosis, the case won't stand. But to get a diagnosis, you need medical care. To get medical care, you need insurance. Without insurance, you need a lot of money. To get a lot of money, you need to be able to work a lot. To work s lot, you need to not be disabled. ...You see? No one can win. I'm really hesitant to even start that process because once you file for it, you can't add any other new diagnosis to your file. You could have lupus and file, then halfway through the process you could lose half your leg in an accident, but you wouldn't be able to add that to your file. You'd have to give up and start all over. And it takes YEARS... For me, I have diagnoses that won't be covered by disability. I have hypothyroidism, hypermobility, and fibromyalgia. The thing is, I'm pretty sure it's Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, but it's so rare (more like missed by doctors) that the doctors I see who CAN diagnose it aren't willing to look into it. Even my physical therapist thinks it's Ehlers-Danlos, she's worked with people who have it and she's sure, but she can't actually diagnose it. That's probably the once shot I have at getting disability, getting that diagnosis. Makes me cry. ;_; But yeah... I was getting at that medical problems will instantly **** up your life unless someone's helping you out a LOT... So a lot of homeless people are disabled, both mentally and physically. It's really messed up.

Oh man, sorry that got so long... Uh, anyway, I am very thoroughly enjoying my new volumes of No.6 because now I have that kiss scene and the dance scene in print. Now I can cry on them for real.

Okay okay, I gotta stop typing and head to my physical therapy appointment. The weather is getting bad today so I have to drive slower... I think it's going to snow right when I'm getting my groceries and coming back home. (Again, sorry for the long rant, but it's all horribly true.)

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 11, 2016, 12:47:16 pm »
Lol I was right, it was lunch hour. So now I have volume 5! Hallelujah! Only three more to go and I'll officially be complete No.6 trash.

Speaking of street merchants and such, thinking back, one of the markets I went to in Ghana was a little like the market in the West block, though less deadly... I definitely felt like I aged at least a few years there. People were trying to rip me off since I wasn't a local (since it's easy to scam tourists, though I wasn't a tourist and I had the chief's daughter helping me out heheheh...), a drunk guy tried to get me to marry him. He was very persistent and followed me around, and I had a merchant chase after me because I wouldn't buy his overpriced goods (it's all bartering at the markets). I was more than ready to go back to my little house and not talk to anyone.

One more thing I just remembered that made me laugh, they have "ground nuts" instead of peanuts (they grow in the ground but aren't quite the same as peanuts) and they make it into what's basically runny peanut butter, but it's called "ground nut paste." Doesn't quite roll off the tongue so well, huh? The women who made it (men hardly did **** there) would sell it at the markets in these giant bowls, and they'd package it in a plastic bag. It looked kinda gross, but it was tasty!

Forest Garden / Re: Chat thread :)
« on: January 11, 2016, 12:27:22 pm »
I'm pretty sure I've hidden while someone's knocked on my door... Very adult of me, right? Also my package is totally here, the slip saying I have a package is in my post office box, and even though the hours posted on the door say the post office should be open... IT'S NOT OPEN! *cracks knuckles* Just gonna bust my way through the gate and get it myself... (Or just check back later when possible lunch hours are over, I think small town post offices have lunch breaks where the desk is closed and they don't post anything saying that.)

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